I realized recently that for years I’ve been trying to figure out what kind of a woman I want to be.
There were times I was the “strong” woman, you know the type, right? Doesn’t take bullshit from anyone, opinionated, gets on with stuff, everyone else’s rock etc. And then there were times I was “needy”, like when I had a crush on a guy that basically had sex with me and then didn’t call again and there was me calling him and texting trying to find out why he wasn’t getting back to me. Classic!
I have been a working mom, a stay at home mom, I’ve been ”slutty”, I’ve been a “prude”, an intellectual, a party girl, chatty, boring, I have been brave and I have be a cowered.
For years I have tried to put myself in a “box” because that’s what I thought I was supposed to do. Society told me that I needed to choose, that I needed to be part of a camp – breast feeders vs bottle feeders, pro-life vs pro-choice, stay at home moms vs working moms, feminist vs chauvinist and so on. And for years I have felt like I was failing cos I just didn’t fit exactly in any of these boxes.
I have finally realized at the age of 42 that life is too short to choose to be just one thing. I refuse to be labelled, I refuse to be divided and I refuse to take sides.
I may not agree with every woman’s choice obviously, but I am going to respect it, why? Because we have been through enough to not support each other. Let’s not do have a history lesson shall we, but just mention how our mothers and their mothers before them fought so that we would have the rights we have today.
You know what else? It hit me the other day that in my attempt to be real and honest about my struggles as a mother I forgot to mention the good stuff. I think people probably think that I just yell at my kids all day and never get anything right.
But the thing is, none of us are just one thing ALL THE TIME.
I am the mom who loses her shit, but I am also the mom who has baths with her kids, who reads them books and has long discussions about magic and faraway lands. I hate arts and crafts and you will probably never catch me baking, but I love dancing with my children and making up silly songs. I lose my temper and I yell but I have also somehow managed to teach them that everyone is special and that if in doubt, just be yourself.
In short, I may be failing beautifully but I am also killing it AND SO ARE YOU!
I have been doing this blogging thing for a year and a half now and in that time I have met so many amazing women from all over the world who are living their truth like total ninjas. We are all different, we’ve all got our past and our stories, the reason why we do things and how we cope with what life throws at us, but we are also SO SIMILAR.
This page is FOR US. It is a place to marvel in how wonderful we are.
This is really the only way to move forward ladies. To make this world better for our daughters and for us! Let’s bring women power back, I really miss it.
Are you with me?